The irony of pregnancy is that the actual 40 weeks is referred to as nine months. This is an especially bitter pill to swallow in the last few weeks, when you may be inclined to remind friends, family and even strangers that, technically, you have been pregnant for 10 months.

But the reality is that the first few weeks, which doctors count as part of the 40, actually take place before you’re even pregnant. This is the time between the first day of your period and conception, and it’s crucial: Once the egg is fertilized and implants, the embryo begins transforming at light speed.  At week five—the third week after conception and the fifth of 40 weeks—the embryo is busy forming its brain, spinal cord, heart and other organs.

This is also the time you may start to throw up.

For many of us, that’s not a funny joke. But my point is, before you even know you’re pregnant, your baby is depending on you to create a safe, healthy environment where he or she can grow. That’s why if you’re considering pregnancy—or even the possibility of pregnancy—pre-conception is the place to start.

Healthy Child Healthy World’s 5 Easy Steps are a great roadmap to creating a healthier environment for you and your family—at each and every stage. Here are two that are super important for pre-conception
and pregnancy.

Avoid Pesticides

There was a time when doctors told pregnant mothers it was okay to smoke and drink alcohol because their babies were protected. Obviously, now we know otherwise—but many women are still misinformed about the dangers of the common contaminants that their fetuses are exposed to. In April, a new study published in Environmental Health Perspectives found exposure to pesticides posed the same risk in pregnancy as smoking tobacco, namely lower birth weight and earlier labor. The study subjects were not agricultural workers; they were exposed to pesticides primarily through food. Should doctors recommend women avoid pesticides during pregnancy as they do cigarettes and alcohol? We think so.

According to the Environmental Working Group, you can lower your pesticide exposure by 90 per cent simply by avoiding the most contaminated conventionally grown produce: peaches, apples, sweet bell peppers, celery, nectarines, strawberries, cherries, lettuce, imported grapes, carrots, and pears.

Confused? Remember, the more delicate-skinned fruits and vegetables tend to absorb more pesticides; typically, you can peel off most of the pesticide residue. For all others, opt for organic whenever possible. And if you like memorizing, conventionally grown produce with the lowest level of pesticide residues include onion, avocado, sweet corn, pineapple, mango, asparagus, sweet peas, kiwi, cabbage, eggplant, papaya, watermelon, broccoli, tomato, and sweet potato.

Eat Healthy

Another recent study, published in the journal Pediatrics, found that obesity during pregnancy may increase a woman’s chances of giving birth to a child with autism—by about 67 percent. When asked about theories linking obesity and autism, the study’s author told The Washington Post that excess blood sugar and inflammation-related substances in the mother’s blood may damage the fetal brain.

To ensure a healthy diet, we recommend eating whole, fresh foods as much as possible. Organic is key for the produce we’ve already talked about, but especially so when it comes to dairy and meat.

Unfortunately, when it comes to meat, even organic, free-range can’t protect you from some organochlorine chemicals, such as dioxin, which scientists have identified as the single most potent synthetic carcinogen. These types of chemicals accumulate in animal fat, transfer to our bodies when we eat meat, and can even be passed on to our children when we’re pregnant. So it makes sense to reduce meat consumption, look for low-fat options, trim all fats and skins and cook meats by broiling, so that the fats drain away as much as possible.

Similarly, seafood is the primary way that we are exposed to mercury, a neurotoxin, and PCBs, which are probably carcinogens. Seafood Watch recommends that we choose fish that are ocean-friendly or lower on the food chain such as wild Alaskan salmon, tilapia and mackerel—especially during pregnancy.

You can get key proteins, vitamins and fats from a variety of vegetarian sources such as beans, legumes and nuts.

Overall, eating organic and reducing meat and seafood consumption—even if it’s just once a week on “meatless Monday”—are great steps to think about before you get pregnant.

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If you using disposable diapers nighttime changes will be seldom. Though, if baby does wake by themselves, I highly recommend a change as you don’t want baby sitting in their own waste. Rarely, if ever, will a well-fitting disposable leak at night.

But cloth. Oh cloth, how I do love thee. However, with a nighttime super-soaker, it turns to more of a love-hate relationship. Soaking through diapers is more common with cloth (no artificial chemicals to make it appear “dry”) so you need to arm yourself with a nighttime stash. You can either double up with a doubler (clever name, eh?) or simply add another prefold to the drawers. Ask any cloth diapering mama and they will have many, many suggestions on their favorite brands and tricks. My personal favorite is to use a synthetic material (like micro fleece) underneath the more natural one that’s touching your baby. Also, using a wool diaper cover should help. If you’re into the two-part system, try using a fitted diaper. These are fantastic for nighttime- just don’t forget the cover on top of it!

Regardless of type of diaper you choose, should your baby have diarrhea or a diaper rash, I would suggest waking baby (gasp!) to change their diaper. Just keep the lights down low by using a nightlight and undress baby as little as possible. I’ve even been known to have a helper (read: husband) wake up to help me go quickly and efficiently to minimize sleep disruption. Even though getting out of bed and potentially waking baby is misery, keeping baby clean and dry will help to prevent baby’s skin from becoming more irritated. Remember, a clean, dry bum makes for a happy baby!

THE DIAPER GURU is a monthly Pregnancy Awareness Month column written by Laura Gately of Blessed Bums Organic Diaper Service. Laura is a happy mama to her first baby, Madeleine. She is the founder and owner of Blessed Bums Organic Diaper Service in Los Angeles where she lives with her family.

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by Stephanie Dawn, ASLP

Trust birth. I hear this a lot in birth circles on Facebook. It is the credo of a certain school of midwifery and the entire basis of the upcoming Trust Birth Conference in Nashville, Tennessee. As someone who has given birth twice, I get it. And as someone who supports expectant Mamas, Papas and birth professionals, what I see is that a lot of people don’t get it. They don’t trust birth. They don’t trust women, and they don’t trust babies. There is a lot of fear in our culture of birth here in the US, where we are steeped in the belief that the hospital is the best place to give birth. This fear is nothing new, it’s ancient really, going back hundreds of years when midwifery was taken out of the hands of women by male doctors, man-midwives, accoucheurs who ‘knew better’. Book trained versus having hands-on experience, these barber-surgeons, as Tina Cassidy states in her book “Birth, The Surprising History of How We Are Born” began intervening in ways that involved forceps, vacuum suction of the baby and of course, cesareans, and therefore “midwifery and obstetrics split along gender and philosophical lines.”

The other day, I was in the shower, where I often receive my best ideas, and I was pondering slowing down in labor and I realized that our entire culture of birth rushes birth. We induce women for all kinds of reasons, many unnecessary in my humble opinion. If a birth isn’t progressing fast enough in someone’s opinion, then we administer pitocin, or ‘pit’ as nurses and doctors call it, a synthetic form of oxytocin, the love hormone, which causes incredibly fast and painful contractions which make labor far more difficult and urgent than it possibly already had been. Our entire culture works against the whole notion of trusting birth, trusting the time that it takes for a baby to be born, and when we look back at the history of birth, we can see why.

In the book Orgasmic Birth, by Elizabeth Davis and Debra Pascali-Bonaro, we gain a look at the critical link between oxytocin and brain waves “that are even deeper and more synchronous than alpha. When not altered by Pitocin or other interventions, the brain waves of laboring women are in theta frequency. This is the deepest level we can experience in a waking state. (We move into delta with sleep.) Theta is associated with extrasensory perception, creative inspiration, and spontaneous problem solving. In theta, time becomes relative and elastic.”

A birth attendant, be they a doula, a nurse, a husband or a doctor has the inherent and explicit responsibility of being sensitive to a laboring Mama’s frequency, her deep inner journey, and to work with it and not against it. As Orgasmic Birth goes on to state, if there is fear in the mother or her attendants during labor, “the doors to ecstasy close and pain increases.”

I highly recommend that all expectant Mamas and Papas read Orgasmic Birth. The authors, a practicing midwife and doula with over 50 years of experience combined, fully trust birth, state the physiological benefits of slowing down in pregnancy and birth and how true respect of birth and women can lead to a greater experience of pleasure and fulfillment and event ecstasy! What a revelation!

In order to experience pleasure in birth, education is the key, for our ‘expectation of birth alters our experience of birth’ as I’ve heard Dr. Christiane Northrup say. And as I like to say, we women are powerful beyond measure and birth is one of the greatest experiences we are given in a lifetime to understand our power. May you learn all that you need to in order to fully stand in your power, trust birth, trust your body and trust the life force that is the birthing energy as you and indeed, is your brand new baby on it’s way to greet you.

Stephanie Dawn, ALSP is a Mother, Speaker, Educator and Spiritual Counselor supporting Mamas and Papas in the prenatal and postpartum period via prayer, counsel and Sacred Birth Coaching. She is the author of the Sacred Birth Workbook, Childbirth Preparation for the Heart, Mind and Spirit, which is now also available in Italian. Contact Stephanie for a complimentary consultation by going to www.stephaniedawn.com

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By Anni Daulter- Author of Sacred Pregnancy

www.sacredpregnancy.com

What is a Sacred Pregnancy and why should I want one?

When I was pregnant with my second child, Lotus, I became obsessed with trying to find women I could connect with that knew about the sacredness of birth and the rite of passage process that every mother goes through, but few mark. My pregnancy craving was for that sisterhood that used to exist back in the day when women lived in tribes and pregnancy wisdom was passed down from mother to mother. Not being able to find what I was truly looking for, I realized something was missing in how we go through our pregnancies in this culture, and that sacred mother sisterhood had been buried, not lost, but buried deep in the past and needed to re-surge for all women. Our bodies create babies, and everyone agrees that is a miraculous wonder, but our spirits create souls and we need to know how to handle the process of creating a “whole” person. I truly believe the way to do this is by connecting to ourselves, the process of growing a baby and other wise women.

Pregnancy is a ride and we need to dig deep in order to navigate the emotional and physical waters of that journey. Its wild, scary, fun, joyous, beautiful, sexy, dirty, bloody and most of all it shapes us into mothers and re-defines how we look at the world.  Every woman DESERVES a Sacred Pregnancy, because it’s her birth-right and it’s our most sacred work that we will ever do. A Sacred Pregnancy is one that is honored and shaped with intention, purpose and celebration. We need to go back to the Kiva and sit with our women tribes and be held with their empowerment, get showered with adornment and learn more ways how to say “YES” to nurturing ourselves. We need to decorate our bellies and let it all hang out, honor our partners as they too travel the road with us, be brave and vulnerable, look into the eyes of our own childhoods so we may pick and choose what we want to take with us into our own mothering choices and most importantly we need to learn that this is a journey we share with others, but ultimately travel alone.

A Sacred Pregnancy is a gift you give yourself and your baby and one that is unique to every single pregnancy and birthing experience.  It’s where, if you let it happen, you become one of the wise women with a blessed sisterhood knowledge that one day you will give to maidens. Hold that power with a delicate hand and when the time is right you will know how to pass it on.

I am honored, humbled and just tickled pink that I have been given the opportunity to write Sacred Pregnancy and that folks are responding so well to it. I hope that each of you finds your way into the book, the website and the community. The Sacred Pregnancy movementhas so much planned and we hope that you are all there to share it with us.

We have just launched Sacred Pregnancy site, the book is ready for pre-order now, and is being released on May 1st, 2012 and coming soon is a never before done sacred hand-picked shop, a campaign called “if your showin’ you should be glowin’, magazine editions of Sacred Pregnancy and of course Sacred Pregnancy Pregnancy + Birthing Class Series. So stay tuned and enjoy the journey.

In gratitude,

Anni Daulter

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The reason is simple: the fetus and newborn are sensitive at levels well below what an adult might tolerate. They are extremely vulnerable to toxic chemicals and other contaminants. If you’re familiar with EWG’s Baby Body Burden study, maybe you already know that cord blood contains almost 300 highly toxic chemicals, proving that whatever the mother ingests, inhales and absorbs is passed on to the baby: http://www.ewg.org/reports/bodyburden2/execsumm.php.

Green products and materials are not necessarily non-toxic, and even the least toxic versions, newly installed, are usually too toxic for the developing fetus and newborn until all odors have completely dissipated. It doesn’t matter if they come with green certifications.  Certifications still aren’t good enough, as their standards are limited in scope and are certainly not developed specifically for the newborn or fetus.

Instead, focus on making the house healthier. Put off as much as you can for a few years and make as few changes as possible that are not directly related to health. When your child is older, and past the most critical time in his or her development, you can undertake your safe, non-toxic projects (including precautions for exposures to new, outgassing materials and construction dust).

Here are some tips for healthy home nesting:

1. Less is more: If you must paint or make even small changes, do not inhale outgassing from new materials, no matter how “green” and “non toxic” they claim to be. Leave while the work is being done and re-enter the house only when ALL odors have dissipated 100%.
2. Replace all toxic household, cleaning and personal products with non-toxic products: http://safecosmetics.org/article.php?id=308
3. Check your home for sources of moisture: Whether or not you react to mold, mold is toxic, period, particularly for the developing fetus and newborn. For starters, follow these steps outlined by the EPA: http://www.epa.gov/mold/preventionandcontrol.html.
4. If you suspect or smell mold, get a mold inspection: Hire an IAQA certified, independent mold inspector to survey your home. (Don’t hire a mold remediation company for the inspection.) http://www.iaqa.org/consumer-info
5. Reduce EMFs: There are many preventive steps you can take at no cost. Learn about them for free on my website and blog: http://marycordaro.com/
6. Caution, carpet removal is toxic: Removing carpet stirs up high levels of toxic chemical-laden dust and microscopic particulates, which pollute the entire house. Remove carpet under airtight containment, and then deep clean the room afterwards. A mold remediation company can most safely remove it and deep clean for you.

Mary Cordaro- Mary Cordaro Inc.

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Citrus Lane’s community of moms offers great tips for helping big siblings adjust to big changes!

Use a baby doll.

If your child hasn’t spent much time around infants, she may not really understand what a baby is! Use a baby doll when talking about the new sibling-to-be. It’s a great way to teach big-sibling skills.

“I bought a little baby doll and had my son hold it and learn to use gentle touches.” —Meghan

Give a big sibling gift “from” the baby.

While you may see diaper cakes and onesies as practical gifts, your child sees the new baby getting dozens of presents! Stop sibling jealousy by giving older siblings a present “from” the baby, like a new toy or a special book.

“We have been reading I’m A Big Sister, What Baby Needs and Baby On The Way.” —Vicki

Include the bigsibling whenever possible.

Involve your child in preparing for the baby to make her feel important. Once the baby arrives, asking her for simple help—like bringing you a burp cloth—will show her you’re on the same side.

“My daughter loves helping pick names, seeing ultrasounds, and getting the nursery ready!” —Victoria

After the baby comes, carve out a little one-on-one time.

A newborn’s mom is always busy! But taking just a few minutes a day to spend one-on-one time with your big kid can nip acting-out in the bud. You don’t need to find the time (or energy!) for fun outings—your child just wants your undivided attention.

“I think the thing that helped the most was taking her on errands all by herself.  We call them big girl days.” —Bethany

We’d love to hear what you have to say, too! What worked for you? Join the conversation here or with our community of moms!

Marcella White Campbell is Citrus Lane’s Social Media Specialist.

Image creit Belzie on Flickr

Image credit: Belzie on Flickr

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1. His and Hers pre-packed diaper bags.

When on parent-at-large duty, one needs a diaper bag. Why a His and Hers?  Well, just like I like to know that my toothpaste and shirts got into my overnight bag, I like to know that I have the essentials right where I want them when I’m in Mom mode.  Same goes for Dad.  When he has his own bag, he’ll know he’s ready with his essentials too.

2.A safe place for baby and for both parents to sleep.

No need for a fancy-shmancy crib – at least not until baby is quite a bit bigger and more mobile.  What is essential is that you have some place (even, yes, the proverbial dresser drawer) that your baby can snooze safely alone.  Equally important, you two need a plan for how you will make sure that both parents get some rest – even when baby is up every three hours!

3.A car seat.

You can’t take baby out of the hospital without an infant car seat – and there’s a reason for this.  There is no safer place for a baby – when traveling and when in a room-full of bouncy siblings and their friends – then safely strapped into an infant car seat.

4. A comfortable sling or wrap-style baby holder.

For transporting baby around for the first few months, slings or wrap-style baby holders rock.  These holders snuggle babies up just how they like to be – in a cozy little ball right by your heartbeat.  Also, nothing is more soothing and does a better job of keeping all those admirers hands away from baby’s face. When picking out a carrier make sure it’s easy on-and-off, fits both of you, and is comfortable when carrying a 15 – 20 pound weight (a jug of water is a pretty good way to test this).

5. A fabulous set of marriage savvy parents.

This matters more than anything you can get in a store. There is truly no bigger blessing for a baby than parents who have put effort into learning how to make a relationship last happy and strong rather than into stressing out over which fancy stroller to buy.

Before the baby arrives is one of the best times to make sure you two are super skilled at communicating, maintaining a healthy emotional climate, making collaborative decisions and building positivity and support.  Check out what you know and what there is still to learn at http://poweroftwomarriage.com/.

Abigail Hirsch, PhD is Resident Psychologist for Power of Two Marriage Online.

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Anna and I realized as we taught and attended Mommy and Me and our local R.I.E. classes, that the yearning to connect to other women who had the wisdom of parenting, the experience of holding breastfeeding infants, and introducing food to toddlers was intense.  And it seemed to be a universal magnetism.  Women seemed to attend mommy and me classes for the Q & A period at the end, or the tea and cookie time afterwards.

Anna created her own resources and links list from her Internet searching, connecting her to more and more via the world wide web, and sharing her growing reading list must haves with me and others around her.  I created grassroots collaboratives with fellow new mom’s from the prenatal classes I attended.  At one point there were 21 families from that class doing a monthly progressive potluck lunch, and we continued as a group until the kids were two.

One day Anna asked how we could create an awareness month focused on pregnancy and parenting.  And we found out how:  say it, live it, create it, do it.  We thank you for joining our 5^th Annual Campaign of Pregnancy Awareness Month®, which is the month of May each year.

Be well, live simply, enjoy every minute,

Alisa Donner,
MSW, LCSW

Co-Founder, Pregnancy Awareness Month®

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In the first post in this three-part series, I explore the Circumstances for Moms Rising (working and returning to work after bearing a child or children). 

In this post, I’ll explore how moms create value in the workplace and marketplace.

Moms Creating Value

The workplace does not typically care about where we are coming from, it cares about what we produce in the workplace. At its core, the workplace or marketplace is about creating and exchanging value.

Here’s where working moms, especially those who are returning to the workplace soon after childbirth, have much to offer beyond the skills, knowledge, experience and expertise directly related to their work.

The same circumstances, outlined above, that distinguish life as new mom from life at work, can give moms and edge at work and bring great value to their teams and companies. Here’s a brief overview of some of the attributes of motherhood that can serve in the workplace:

• Perspective: Being a parent puts things in perspective. When a baby’s life depends on your attention and care, other things don’t seem so critical. And the depth of connection, the openness you feel towards your baby, the love and care you focus on your baby can carry into the workplace, touching and inspiring others – colleagues, customers, and others.
• Focus and concentration: The absorption of motherhood hones a mom’s ability to focus and concentrate, in spite of personal needs and outside interference. Clearly useful skills at work.
• Perseverance: To attend to baby’s needs in spite of utter exhaustion builds a special kind of strength and perseverance that can be very useful at work.
• Passion and Purpose: These two are among the most powerful forces for inspiring and motivating people. The passion and sense of purpose you are filled with as a mom can transfer into the workplace and fan the fire of their passion and sense of purpose.

In the final post in this three-part series, I will outline some Tips for Flourishing.

Resources:

Momsrising.org

Strollerstrides.com

Pregnancyawarenessmonth.com

Jeff Klein is CEO of Working for Good, a company that activates, produces and facilitates mission-based, Stakeholder Engagement Marketing™ campaigns and Conscious Culture development programs.

Jeff is a trustee and member of the executive committee of Conscious Capitalism, Inc. and authored the award-winning book, Working for Good: Making a Difference While Making a Living. He is producing Being Human 2012, on March 24, 2012 in San Francisco.

Jeff contributed a piece entitled “Growing Together – A Father’s Story” in Ordinary Men, Extraordinary Lives: Defining Moments – Men’s Anthology

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No question about it, pregnancy and the first year post-partum are doozies on a lady’s mood. Even for those lucky folks who are generally happy, it’s pretty unlikely that anyone can make it through two years of sleep deprivation, hormone shifts, crazy body transformations, and, oh yeah, having and caring for a baby without a few leaky faucet days.

Here is how you can handle these days in a way that strengthens yourself and your marriage.

1) When the faucet is leaky, fix it!   Instead of dismissing the tears or mood swings as “just part of the deal,” communicate with your spouse and see if the two of you can figure out why the faucet is leaking NOW as opposed to yesterday. After talking Andrea she realized that her tears really surged when she thought about their daycare plan.  They had planned to hire a nanny and she didn’t like any of the 20 people she’d interviewed.  As soon as she listened to what was causing the leak, she and her husband broadened the search to include day care centers.  She found one she loved, and, voilá, the faucet stopped leaking. Remember, while your tears may be exaggerated by the hormones, that doesn’t mean they don’t have a legitimate cause.

2)Sleep, eat and be active.  Even just a night or two of solid sleep coupled with healthy food and activity can work wonders. Plan ahead to figure out how, whenever it’s needed, you can be off baby duty for a full 6 to 8 hours to just sleep. Pick out a few super healthy meals and prepare shopping lists and instructions so that your husband or friend can get you a meal that’s truly good for you. Lastly, figure out how to get moving – in a pool if you’re as big as a beached whale, outside with baby, or even just bopping in the living room to your favorite music.  Yoga and meditation are other good ways of calming your mind and rejuvenating your body.

3) When all else fails, call the plumber.  How long would you wait between having a leak that won’t stop and actually calling a plumber? Probably not much more than a week. No matter what anyone says, it is not healthy or normal to feel blue, pre- or post-baby, for more than a week or so.  If this is happening talk to your OB, visit a therapist (and I’d highly recommend going as a couple at least to your first visit) or try an alternative medical professional (acupuncture,homeopathy, energy field therapist). Keep looking for help until you find an expert who helps you to stop the leak.

Abigail Hirsch, PhD is Resident Psychologist for Power of Two Marriage Online.

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